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Yesterday was one of the first really nice days of spring, 60 degrees and not a cloud in the sky. I decided to take the afternoon off and motor around, but I ended up on one heck of a wild goose hunt. (I needed the countersunk M8-40 screws to install my used hand guards)

I stopped at the auto parts store right by my office with no luck (1). I then stopped over at Lowes, which had a countersunk M8-35 and hex head M8-40/50-60’s, but no countersunk M8-40’s (2). I drove on home and informed the wife I had taken the afternoon off. She was set to go into work at two so I told her to grab her things and hop on the bike.

After getting all suited up we loaded up the bike and were set to take off. I gave the 50r a little throttle, trying to be real smooth, and ended up letting the clutch out a little too fast. The bike surged ahead rather abruptly, causing the wife to lose her balance throwing the bike over a bit. This was all a bit startling and I ended up completely letting off the throttle, with the clutch engaged, which caused a stall. With the bike still in gear and the engine stopped the bike stopped rather violently, my wife (still unbalanced) flew forward into me causing me to slam forward into the now stationary gas tank with my poor misters crushed like soft marshmallows.

For the next 3 minutes I prayed for a quick death.

Once my eyes uncrossed we managed to finally get underway. Up a winding residential road is a hole-in-the-wall bar and grill that serves fantastic burgers and beer (not that we had any of the later) after having our fill, we loaded up and I took the wife to work. With her dropped off I thought I’d head to the local Honda/Kaw/Yamaha dealer to see if they had any countersunk M8-40 screws. They didn’t (3), so I stopped at the hardware shop across the street. No luck there either (4), but they told me to head to Menards across town. No Dice (5), however the old guy there was sure that Nena’s hardware on the west side would have some. He was wrong (6); they sent me over to Fastenall in the industrial section of downtown. Apparently Fastenall carries every fastener known to man except countersunk M8-40’s (7). I decided to try the Suzuki/Honda dealer out in Pekin, without any luck (8 ). They sent me to the old-as-dirt hardware store on the other side of town, “14th street hardware’s got everything. I’m sure they’ll have it.” I wouldn’t be so sure (9). The little old lady at 14th street hardware sent me over to, “this new fangled store uptown.” Strike ten (10). They mentioned a place on the east side of East Peoria, so I motor on up the road. By this point I’ve gotten a bit tired of the run around so I take a detour onto the superslab to wind her out a bit. During my run around I started to notice something about the 50r.

She’s a saucy, little minx. She doesn’t respond well to silk and flowers. She prefers handcuffs and leather. Try to ride her gentle and it’s a chore, smack her around a bit and she’ll give you the ride of your life. Flick the throttle open and run her to redline, throw her into the corner while standing on the brakes, then run her back to redline again and again. That’s how she likes it, so that’s what I give her.

Anyways, after playing around at triple digit speed on the superslab I get back off in East Peoria and head over to the hardware store. I wasn’t expecting much, and it was a good thing because I struck out there as well (11). By now it’s pushing five o’clock and it’s time to pick the wife up from work. She wants to stop by this new purse store, she’s been on a purse kick for a few months, so off we go. After the incident earlier, I told her that while we were in traffic to hold onto the handrail and to be ready for quick stops if needed. She complies.

We get to the purse store and I stay out with the bike. There’s about 50 estrogen crazed women in there and there is no need to put myself in harms way. After a half hour the wife comes out and we head for Barnes and Noble. (We’re both giant nerds, so a coffee at a bookstore is much more exciting than going to a bar) We hang around the bookstore for an hour or so and then decide to head back home. By now it’s starting to get dark and a little cool. The ride is uneventful except for the thousands of lightning bugs committing suicide on my helmet. We pull into the driveway, open the garage door and put the old girl to bed for the night. I take off my gear, grab a beer and sit on the porch for a while.

It was a good day.

OP...arn't you meant to smoke a cigarette after an experience like that....and was it good for you too.... ....seriously...you're a lucky man having a wife that like to ride with you.

DJ

Brilliant.

That write-up had every thing. Humor, violence, speed, S&M, tedium (humerously reported) and contented, post-nad-mashing beer consumption.

Very nice, indeed.

I dunno how you've been able to make a simple fastener into the modern Grail. So many other listers have made the same mod w/out embarking on a National Geographic tour of Hardware Through The Ages...

I'm wondering if it wouldn't be easier to have one machined to spec, or carve one out of wood at this point?

And agreed about the Roadster running happiest from 5-7k. A Harley-riding buddy once asked, after catching up at the lunch spot, "Why do you give it the berries, everywhere you go?"

Because I can. All of the power on the 50R is usable, unlike the R1 or even, really, the K12RS I rode recently. Doesn't mean you won't end up in jail, but you're less likely to spit yourself into the weeds grabbing a fistfull and that, as they say, is where the fun lives.

I got about 200 miles in on Sunday and, thus, the GS is in the shop for the 500 (and to have the bag lock cylinders matched to the key). THAT means I'm essentially ready to meet y'all down at Champaign whenever you want. It's around 515 miles so I'll need a day to get there; if we're meeting for doughnuts and coffee I'll prolly run down to Madison the night before.

Gimme an approach vector and I'll work on a launch sequence!

Cheers,

-rkd

Great write up! I LMAO!
T.

O.P.! Dude! That was great! Man I have to agree with you on the bike's affinity for carrousing.
My wife (back when I had a wife) would ride with me, but it was really hard to "take it easy". It also is not a really good two-up bike for that reason. It carries the extra weight alright, and it handles on the road and in the curves just about as well, but when you slow down to cruising speed....and move into that stop and go mode, life just sucks with another person on this bike with you.

Nice report. Couldn't you have at least taken one or two pics for us?

O.P. suggests,

"She’s a saucy, little minx. She doesn’t respond well to silk and flowers. She prefers handcuffs and leather. Try to ride her gentle and it’s a chore, smack her around a bit and she’ll give you the ride of your life."

Boxer asks,

"Couldn't you have at least taken one or two pics for us?"

And the readers wonder if they clicked onto a "MOTORCYCLE" chat board????

Gotta love it, simply gotta LOVE IT!

Thanks, it was good for me......

rkdemay wrote:Brilliant.

That write-up had every thing. Humor, violence, speed, S&M, tedium (humerously reported) and contented, post-nad-mashing beer consumption.

I hope that no other write-ups have "post-nad-smashing" anything.

rkdemay wrote: I dunno how you've been able to make a simple fastener into the modern Grail. So many other listers have made the same mod w/out embarking on a National Geographic tour of Hardware Through The Ages...

I'm wondering if it wouldn't be easier to have one machined to spec, or carve one out of wood at this point?

It was a quest for sure, and it turns out that the countersunk M8-35's from Lowes (2) worked just fine.

rkdemay wrote: And agreed about the Roadster running happiest from 5-7k. A Harley-riding buddy once asked, after catching up at the lunch spot, "Why do you give it the berries, everywhere you go?"

Because I can. All of the power on the 50R is usable, unlike the R1 or even, really, the K12RS I rode recently. Doesn't mean you won't end up in jail, but you're less likely to spit yourself into the weeds grabbing a fistfull and that, as they say, is where the fun lives.

I know what you mean. I've found it seriously difficult to keep the speed down when road and traffic conditions allow. Just pulling away from stop signs in the country requires a couple trips to redline

rkdemay wrote: I got about 200 miles in on Sunday and, thus, the GS is in the shop for the 500 (and to have the bag lock cylinders matched to the key). THAT means I'm essentially ready to meet y'all down at Champaign whenever you want. It's around 515 miles so I'll need a day to get there; if we're meeting for doughnuts and coffee I'll prolly run down to Madison the night before.

Gimme an approach vector and I'll work on a launch sequence!

Cheers,

-rkd

I'll give the dealership a call today. I think it was NK ED that was the ring-leader. Maybe we should post on the main or group ride board to figure it out. 12,000 is coming up quick, so I'm gonna need a service.

-Jason